BitterSweet Beauty

ok so wat now i kno i bitch i kno i complain smh shud i give up shud i waste a whole nother year like i did wit sean? smh ion kno i love him i love him more then i loved sean n dis blog knew how much i love sean how crazy i went i love me n i kno my worth dats y i spaze out when plp hurt me im like wat the fuk did i do smh i kno wat i did all dis is karma on wat i use to do when i was wit sean all we did was have sex he wud fuk me n take me back home smh wat the fuk n i did it cus i love him he confused lust wit love so he told me he love me so me thinkin lust is love i sent all these naked pics to these girls gay phase when everyone ask was i gay never had sex wit a gurl but i was gay as fuk so wit that cums which cums me thinkin its lust i masterbated everyday all day nonstop cus u kno dat was da only way i didnt feel empty so now dis is my karma but diffrence is i love drew sean didnt love me sean never saw me im always around drew doin wateva pleses him like really doin wateva he want then he do dis n i hurt den i do dat n i hurt n he do it again again again then again do i say fuk it n get over n love him cus its no physical dats da only reason i havent left or givein up or lose love but den he go see this freaky ass old bitch man really y wud he tlk to her or wanna fuk her or be wit her or leave me for her when u 26 n u doin shit 16 year olds do sending niggas u dnt kno naked pics wat that say about wat kinda female she is i understand he had to vent n i mean i do the same but ion go see the plp ion go getin naked dick pics n i was to try to get even n do the same i wud be a lpw dwn bitch y do i always end up applogizeing cus i love so i cant lose but im finna say fuk it cus i anit got the energy i wanna build a life n family wit this man but now he feel diffrent y cus niggas n his ear say so he may break up wit me n regreat it forever me ill keep workin on it as long as he dnt stick his dick n anywere else if that happen i pray it dnt then im leaveing n not cumin back n sean think im cumin back i will never look at u the same y shud i settle for the shit when they wudnt it anit fair i kno my worth i kno ima good person plz kno dis i will never cheat on drew n dey say never say never y cus im women enough to make the right chose love shud make u think naw i love dis girl i cant do her like did when u findburself n a fuk sitiuation he went to go see her n i lety ex cum seee me ok i givr him dat n it was cool seeing sean but the whole time i thought about him n his fam n friends got sum fukin nerve dis nigga cheated on me but im the crazy bitch for takein my anger out the way i did smh i jus got mad ughh finna pray n ask god for contentness n sanity smh fml for now anyway i hope drew n my love advance n grow instead of fukin up n fadeing jus gotta keep folks out my biz i told god if he bring drew back to me i wudnt fuk u so if i get angry or sad or mad blog u will be seeing me i deserve real love it suck to kno no matter wat or hpw much a nogga lovebu dey g gone cheat or fuk up smh ok im do foreal goodnite well good a.m God plz bless ya boi (me)